Navy SEAL In Town To Support Multiple Schlerosis Walk North Central Ohio A Navy SEAL is in town to support his mother, in an effort to raise awareness about Multiple Sclerosis. Hector, whose last name will be withheld, is in Mansfield to participate in the MS Walk, his mother, Millie Torres, has organzied. ... and more »

"It's all about saving Aunt Millie"
Bob Swanson
Co-Founder of Genentech

I just learned today that Jim DeKloe, who wrote this post as a guest author a few years ago is giving a webinar on May 11th on protein purification from industrial enzymes to cancer therapy.

Jim's webinar, offered through Bio-Rad, has two sessions at 3 pm Eastern and 7 pm Eastern. Registration is free and you can register HERE.

Jim is one of the most inspirational educators I know and he's the sort of person that reminds you why educating students about biotechnology careers is important. His moving story is one that always reminds me that there's more to biotechnology than just the science.

Read the rest of this post... | Read the comments on this post...

Navy SEAL In Town To Support Multiple Sclerosis Walk WMFD.com A Navy SEAL is in town to support his mother, in an effort to raise awareness about Multiple Sclerosis. Hector, whose last name will be withheld, is in Mansfield to participate in the MS Walk, his mother, Millie Torres, has organized. ...

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Stay at America's Best Inn in a comfortable, clean room.  Our friendly staff will be happy to assist you!  We offer our guests: Free continental breakfast, pool, whirlpool, fitness room, game room, Wireless Internet access, computer access, in-room coffee makers, cable TV with free HBO, conference room, wake-up calls, large parking lot, pet rooms available for a small fee, not to mention a great location.

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'Pared-down' musical opens at the Theatre Royal Drury Lane after failing to wow the critics on Broadway

Merchandise stalls are still being painted in the foyer, teams of ushers are being put through their paces and three blind mice are rehearsing their routine. Despite the activity, the Theatre Royal Drury Lane feels surprisingly relaxed. But of course it's not.

On Friday night previews will begin of the West End version of Shrek the Musical, a big-budget show that closed early on Broadway in January 2010 after a year.

It is a big gamble. If the show failed to establish itself in New York, why might it do any better in London? The creative team behind it believe they have learned from their mistakes on Broadway, where, although not disliked, it failed to wow critics. Caro Newling, one of the show's British producers, said the team had been guilty of being dazzled by the opportunity to do lots of things first time round.

"In terms of script, this is the most pared-down version we've done and it's also the clearest," she said. "A lot of big musicals go through this I think, you overstuff the cushion. I also think there's more confidence in the British team. Now that we're on our own patch we've been able to just go with the instinct."

Shrek is a big production that has taken many years to create, but its origins lie in the small West End theatre the Donmar Warehouse. It is co-produced by Neal Street Productions, founded by the Donmar's former artistic director Sam Mendes and Newling. It was Mendes who saw the potential of a stage production of Shrek and suggested it to DreamWorks boss Jeffrey Katzenberg.

The British version is probably closer to the Shrek show currently touring the US successfully. Briton Tim Hatley, the show's designer, who won a Tony for his costumes in 2009, said it was now a better show than in New York. "There's a new energy to this production because for so many of the people involved, it's fresh to them. Almost all of my lot are new and so energised by this.

"Also just the chance of having a look at it again, see what works, keep the good bits, change the bits that aren't so good. It's just a fantastic opportunity."

Newling concedes the team spent too much money on the New York production and says the new version has cost a third of the original. "London is fleeter of foot in every way," she said, adding that the first version was trying to do too many things.

"This is still a big show, there are still ooh-aah moments, but they are when they need to happen – they're not happening solidly for two and a half hours."

Terri Paddock, managing director of Whatsonstage.com, said bringing Shrek to the West End was undoubtedly a risk given the size of the theatre – which is one of London's biggest, with more than 2,200 seats. "People are waiting to see, to make up their own minds. I don't think what happened on Broadway is counting against it."

The West End version has Rob Ashford as director, an associate director at the Donmar who directed Rachel Weisz in the award-winning A Streetcar Named Desire. The Donmar connection continues with the actors – both Nigel Lindsay, who plays Shrek, and Nigel Harman who plays evil Prince Farquaad, had early stage successes there.

Critics will pass judgment in five weeks' time, the long period of previews caused partly because actor Amanda Holden, who plays Princess Fiona, will be performing her final duties as a judge on Britain's Got Talent. There has been some sniping at Holden, but she is not new to musical theatre, having attracted great reviews when she starred in Ashford's Thoroughly Modern Millie five years ago. "There is nobody in this cast who hasn't worked their arse off to get the role," said Newling. "Amanda really worked to get the part, she really wanted it."

A group of concerned citizens, including Pat Bailey, Marcia Cavanaugh, Nancy Kennedy, Carol Mattegat, Millie Anderson, Barbara Krausz, and myself, asks the community to consider problems we face before attempting another budget adoption.

arts@sfbg.com

FILM A few wordless minutes into Meek's Cutoff, we see a boy carving the word "LOST" into a log. You know then that Kelly Reichardt has made another movie about being stranded in America, this one a neorealist western. The year is 1845, and a three-wagon caravan is crossing the hardscrabble northwestern plains en route to the Willamette. The families have hired the rogue guide Meek (Bruce Greenwood) to show them the way, but he's only got them low on water. The place we now call Oregon remains contested territory. There are dire murmurs that Meek may be a British agent, purposefully leading American settlers astray; Meek redirects this unease toward the prospect of race war. When the group captures a Cayuse man (Rod Rondeaux), the guide advocates hanging. Sanguine Solomon (Will Patton) maintains that they should keep him on to find water.

The distant shots of the men deliberating their best route — patent guesswork — could be from any of the three women's perspectives, but we have little doubt the attentiveness belongs to Solomon's wife Emily (Michelle Williams, reprising her role as Reichardt's moral center). Millie (Zoe Kazan) is young and weak-minded (she falls prey to Meek's fear-mongering); Glory (Shirley Henderson) is pious, pregnant, and reluctant to accept charity. Emily is skeptical of the wisdom of men.

Meek's Cutoff is in large part about Emily's being brought to action — first to try to earn the Indian's trust by mending his moccasin, and second by holding Meek at gunpoint when he aims to fulfill his blood lust. Unlike the Indians in classical "progressive" westerns like Broken Arrow (1950), the Cayuse does not prove himself as the noble embodiment of liberal values. He remains wholly Other, and any perceived alignment with Emily is ultimately incommensurable. The film offers a clear moral preference for Emily's stand, but Reichardt and screenwriter Jon Raymond's loose chain of scenes — one imagines them as chapters with plainly descriptive titles, as in 19th century novels — neither rewards nor punishes such conviction.

After working with different cinematographers on each of her previous features, Reichardt has found a keeper in Chris Blauvelt: the slow, nearly psychedelic dissolves, distant views of riders approaching and lamp-lit conversations burnish this film with a newfound compositional integrity. Reichardt's expressive sound design (a squeaky wheel is practically a character) and knack for staging muffled performances remain in evidence, but not everything works so well in Meek's Cutoff. In particular, the title character's transformation from charismatic braggart to hateful sociopath feels roughshod. By the time Emily has him at gunpoint, the scales have tipped. She's too brave by half, and his monstrousness is similarly overstretched.

Yet one forgives this narrative convenience because Reichardt in other ways acknowledges the difficulty of mounting a western with a female protagonist. Gone are the telling gestures, close-ups, and music cues glinting through Old Joy (2006) and Wendy and Lucy (2008); the oblique camera style shies away even from the minor pleasures of detail. These things have everything to do with the film's torn attitude toward the genre: one in which key dualities of wilderness-civilization and individual-community are resolved by the arrival of a man who knows how and why to use a gun.

Williams submerges into the role as she did with Wendy, another marooned pilgrim, projecting tense defiance rather than magical iconography. Reichardt and Raymond cast the ideal of heroism still further adrift from any notion of destiny in their stand-still plotting of scenes. Meek's Cutoff may be the antithesis of Cormac McCarthy's The Road — instead of a fantasy of fatherly love slicing through a postapocalyptic nowhere, here we have the struggle for the soul of a fragile community that may not survive, but is liable to be remembered.

MEEK'S CUTOFF opens Fri/6 in Bay Area theaters.

Who's running awards?  Seems like Jay-Z is.  He just copped himself an Emmy.  We'll tell you how, plus details on Cash Money millionaire's Baby's new $8 millie car, when you read on....

Jay-Z snapped up a Sports Emmy for for Outstanding Music Composition/ Direction/ Lyrics for their renditions of "Run This Town" during last year's sporting events.  Jay-Z is named as a composer on his track that played before the Superbowl.

Congrats.  And speaking of Jay, his wife Beyonce and Bruno Mars have reportedly recorded vocals for a track that will appear on Jay & Kanye's upcoming Watch The Throne collabo album due out this summer.

In other news, Baby is spending up his money quickly these days.  The Cash Money Millionaire daddy figure to Lil Wayne snapped up the luxe Maybach Exelero. 

The car goes for $10 million...but Baby copped it for a cool $8 million.  Oh, but that's not all.  Baby tweeted a pic of the car in red saying he's going to get it a paint job as well:

The car, which reaches speeds of 217 mph, is completely custom and just became available to the public in 2008.  I guess his candy painted Maybach will join his other million dollar cars--the Maybach Landaulet and the Bugatti Veyron.  Do you boo.

arts@sfbg.com

FILM A few wordless minutes into Meek's Cutoff, we see a boy carving the word "LOST" into a log. You know then that Kelly Reichardt has made another movie about being stranded in America, this one a neorealist western. The year is 1845, and a three-wagon caravan is crossing the hardscrabble northwestern plains en route to the Willamette. The families have hired the rogue guide Meek (Bruce Greenwood) to show them the way, but he's only got them low on water. The place we now call Oregon remains contested territory. There are dire murmurs that Meek may be a British agent, purposefully leading American settlers astray; Meek redirects this unease toward the prospect of race war. When the group captures a Cayuse man (Rod Rondeaux), the guide advocates hanging. Sanguine Solomon (Will Patton) maintains that they should keep him on to find water.

The distant shots of the men deliberating their best route — patent guesswork — could be from any of the three women's perspectives, but we have little doubt the attentiveness belongs to Solomon's wife Emily (Michelle Williams, reprising her role as Reichardt's moral center). Millie (Zoe Kazan) is young and weak-minded (she falls prey to Meek's fear-mongering); Glory (Shirley Henderson) is pious, pregnant, and reluctant to accept charity. Emily is skeptical of the wisdom of men.

Meek's Cutoff is in large part about Emily's being brought to action — first to try to earn the Indian's trust by mending his moccasin, and second by holding Meek at gunpoint when he aims to fulfill his blood lust. Unlike the Indians in classical "progressive" westerns like Broken Arrow (1950), the Cayuse does not prove himself as the noble embodiment of liberal values. He remains wholly Other, and any perceived alignment with Emily is ultimately incommensurable. The film offers a clear moral preference for Emily's stand, but Reichardt and screenwriter Jon Raymond's loose chain of scenes — one imagines them as chapters with plainly descriptive titles, as in 19th century novels — neither rewards nor punishes such conviction.

After working with different cinematographers on each of her previous features, Reichardt has found a keeper in Chris Blauvelt: the slow, nearly psychedelic dissolves, distant views of riders approaching and lamp-lit conversations burnish this film with a newfound compositional integrity. Reichardt's expressive sound design (a squeaky wheel is practically a character) and knack for staging muffled performances remain in evidence, but not everything works so well in Meek's Cutoff. In particular, the title character's transformation from charismatic braggart to hateful sociopath feels roughshod. By the time Emily has him at gunpoint, the scales have tipped. She's too brave by half, and his monstrousness is similarly overstretched.

Yet one forgives this narrative convenience because Reichardt in other ways acknowledges the difficulty of mounting a western with a female protagonist. Gone are the telling gestures, close-ups, and music cues glinting through Old Joy (2006) and Wendy and Lucy (2008); the oblique camera style shies away even from the minor pleasures of detail. These things have everything to do with the film's torn attitude toward the genre: one in which key dualities of wilderness-civilization and individual-community are resolved by the arrival of a man who knows how and why to use a gun.

Williams submerges into the role as she did with Wendy, another marooned pilgrim, projecting tense defiance rather than magical iconography. Reichardt and Raymond cast the ideal of heroism still further adrift from any notion of destiny in their stand-still plotting of scenes. Meek's Cutoff may be the antithesis of Cormac McCarthy's The Road — instead of a fantasy of fatherly love slicing through a postapocalyptic nowhere, here we have the struggle for the soul of a fragile community that may not survive, but is liable to be remembered.

MEEK'S CUTOFF opens Fri/6 in Bay Area theaters.

arts@sfbg.com

FILM A few wordless minutes into Meek's Cutoff, we see a boy carving the word "LOST" into a log. You know then that Kelly Reichardt has made another movie about being stranded in America, this one a neorealist western. The year is 1845, and a three-wagon caravan is crossing the hardscrabble northwestern plains en route to the Willamette. The families have hired the rogue guide Meek (Bruce Greenwood) to show them the way, but he's only got them low on water. The place we now call Oregon remains contested territory. There are dire murmurs that Meek may be a British agent, purposefully leading American settlers astray; Meek redirects this unease toward the prospect of race war. When the group captures a Cayuse man (Rod Rondeaux), the guide advocates hanging. Sanguine Solomon (Will Patton) maintains that they should keep him on to find water.

The distant shots of the men deliberating their best route — patent guesswork — could be from any of the three women's perspectives, but we have little doubt the attentiveness belongs to Solomon's wife Emily (Michelle Williams, reprising her role as Reichardt's moral center). Millie (Zoe Kazan) is young and weak-minded (she falls prey to Meek's fear-mongering); Glory (Shirley Henderson) is pious, pregnant, and reluctant to accept charity. Emily is skeptical of the wisdom of men.

Meek's Cutoff is in large part about Emily's being brought to action — first to try to earn the Indian's trust by mending his moccasin, and second by holding Meek at gunpoint when he aims to fulfill his blood lust. Unlike the Indians in classical "progressive" westerns like Broken Arrow (1950), the Cayuse does not prove himself as the noble embodiment of liberal values. He remains wholly Other, and any perceived alignment with Emily is ultimately incommensurable. The film offers a clear moral preference for Emily's stand, but Reichardt and screenwriter Jon Raymond's loose chain of scenes — one imagines them as chapters with plainly descriptive titles, as in 19th century novels — neither rewards nor punishes such conviction.

After working with different cinematographers on each of her previous features, Reichardt has found a keeper in Chris Blauvelt: the slow, nearly psychedelic dissolves, distant views of riders approaching and lamp-lit conversations burnish this film with a newfound compositional integrity. Reichardt's expressive sound design (a squeaky wheel is practically a character) and knack for staging muffled performances remain in evidence, but not everything works so well in Meek's Cutoff. In particular, the title character's transformation from charismatic braggart to hateful sociopath feels roughshod. By the time Emily has him at gunpoint, the scales have tipped. She's too brave by half, and his monstrousness is similarly overstretched.

Yet one forgives this narrative convenience because Reichardt in other ways acknowledges the difficulty of mounting a western with a female protagonist. Gone are the telling gestures, close-ups, and music cues glinting through Old Joy (2006) and Wendy and Lucy (2008); the oblique camera style shies away even from the minor pleasures of detail. These things have everything to do with the film's torn attitude toward the genre: one in which key dualities of wilderness-civilization and individual-community are resolved by the arrival of a man who knows how and why to use a gun.

Williams submerges into the role as she did with Wendy, another marooned pilgrim, projecting tense defiance rather than magical iconography. Reichardt and Raymond cast the ideal of heroism still further adrift from any notion of destiny in their stand-still plotting of scenes. Meek's Cutoff may be the antithesis of Cormac McCarthy's The Road — instead of a fantasy of fatherly love slicing through a postapocalyptic nowhere, here we have the struggle for the soul of a fragile community that may not survive, but is liable to be remembered.

MEEK'S CUTOFF opens Fri/6 in Bay Area theaters.

Last week I scrambled trying to find this one specific photograph of Millie mowing the lawn at the rental house in Tuscaloosa. The house that is now destroyed by a tornado. Thankfully I found it. I still haven’t been able to connect with Millie’s best friend and her family and I am still hoping this [...]

The actress talks about her new lease of life as senior talent show judge… and green ogre princess

Your Britain's Got Talent fans might be surprised that you're playing Princess Fiona in Shrek the Musical, which starts previewing in the West End this week. But you were Olivier-nominated for your last West End turn weren't you?

Yes, for Millie in Thoroughly Modern Millie in 2002. But I'd say Princess Fiona is probably my favourite role out of those two because it's funny, feisty and camp. It's also a much easier part. For Millie I didn't leave the stage at all. Shrek is more of an ensemble piece and much less demanding. I might even be able to catch EastEnders between scenes.

Were you looking out for a part like this?

Yes, I was. My husband recently tracked down a clip of me playing Millie, and it reminded me of how much fun it had been. So when my agent asked me if I fancied doing another musical because they were seeing people for Shrek, I said "Yes" straight away, not least because it's a massive franchise in our house, as you'd expect with a five-year-old daughter. I never usually tell people when I'm going for an audition but I stupidly said to her, "Mummy's going to see if the man wants me to be Princess Fiona today," and every day after that for weeks she kept saying, "Oh Mummy, when will the man know if he wants you to do it?" We eventually got the news when I was rather glamorously having drinks with Daniel Radcliffe in LA. We both have the same agent. She popped open champagne at 10 in the morning.

Who, your daughter?

No, my agent. My daughter Lexie does occasionally dip her finger in my bubbles but she says she prefers wine, which is a bit worrying. God, I sound like Katie Price. But she – my daughter – is truly delighted about me being Princess Fiona. Every picture she draws now is of me in the role with a green face and horns.

Are you happy being back on stage?

Next year it is going to be 20 years since I have been in the business, can you believe it? I was always singing when I was little, always. I had a little tape machine and I'd join in with Julie Andrews. Doing this has brought back that kind of joy for me again.

You're also back on TV in Britain's Got Talent and are now the longest-standing judge on the show following the departure of Simon Cowell and Piers Morgan. How does that feel?

I'm the old bag in the middle. That's how everyone sees me, isn't it? But it's been a completely different experience and it is a completely different show this time with Michael McIntyre and David Hasselhoff. It is so much more relaxed. Because as much as I am dear friends with Simon and Piers it has almost been more fun without them. I'm the boss now and I don't have two egos to tiptoe around. Piers has such a command of the English language that he had already used every blinking adjective I had in my head before I opened my mouth. And Simon used to make his bitchy remarks so that all that was left for me to say was, "Yes, I loved you, you're through". And I was left thinking, "What's the point?" But now I finally have a role, and the other two are coming to me for advice. Michael is very funny and I'm extremely fond of the Hoff. He's good to look at, even if it is in disbelief most of the time.

Has the show been harmed by Cowell's departure?

I honestly don't think it has. Last week we killed everything else on telly. I imagine that's a kind of double-edged sword for Simon because he wants us to do well, obviously – he's the producer. But I don't know how he feels about us doing quite so well without him on the panel.

Are you in touch with him often?

Oh, yes, we talk all the time. He's so sweet. He is thrilled with the ratings and is very kind about what I am saying and how I'm looking. And it is so lovely when a man gives you a compliment. Especially when it comes from God.

Are you looking forward to Cowell's return for the finals?

I can't wait. I keep suggesting ways for him to make his entrance. I think he should be dressed in a toga and descend from the clouds like a deity.

The show has turned you into a national treasure. It's a big change from the negative press after the break-up of your first marriage to Les Dennis, isn't it?

That was part of Simon's plan. Before the first series he said to me, "You're a very likable girl, Amanda, and I think people will be able to see who you actually are when you're on the show because there is nowhere to hide." That's been the greatest gift he has given me. People have been able to see that as cheeky and as flirty as I am, I am not the dreadful slapper that the press used to portray me as. But it will probably all turn around and people will hate me again in a couple of years.

Were you aware of people warming to you?

Yes, and I've noticed it especially in the past few months.

Do you mean since losing your baby?

Yes, people have been amazing. The letters and messages from friends and strangers alike have been such an enormous help. As much as there is a downside to it – sometimes you don't want to be watched, or for all your business to be in the public eye so that you can't even go for a private walk because everybody knows what's happened to you – the flipside is that everybody does know and they are behind you. They care. It's been a gift.

Has it also helped being busy rehearsing for Shrek?

My family are my priority but I've always had a strong work ethic and I like to be busy. I'm in the lucky position financially where I don't have to do things I don't want to do. But Shrek in particular is something I genuinely wanted to do for my daughter and for me personally, and it has turned out to be the best therapy. Without wanting to sound glib, if you're ever feeling down just paint yourself green and start tap dancing. It works for me.

Londres.- Millie Pilkington, la fotógrafo privada contratada para inmortalizar la parte más íntima la boda del príncipe Guillermo y Catalina, los duques de Cambridge, desveló hoy algunos detalles de la fiesta nocturna en el palacio de Buckingham a la que asistieron los familiares y amigos más cercanos de la pareja.

Pilkington, amiga de la familia Middleton, ya fue la encargada de hacer un álbum privado durante la boda en 2005 entre el príncipe Carlos, el padre de Guillermo, y Camilla, duquesa de Cornualles.

Anoche fotografío a los 300 elegidos que participaron en la cena y la posterior fiesta en palacio, y esta mañana relató a los medios locales que se trató de "un asunto maravilloso, íntimo y familiar", en los que no faltaron los tradicionales discursos.

Hablaron el hermano y padrino del novio, el príncipe Enrique, y Michael y James Middleton, padre y hermano de la novia, que pronunciaron unos discursos "que fueron absolutamente para desternillarse de risa", según explicó la fotógrafa.

Pilkington explicó que Catalina demostró que es una persona "muy dulce" al acercarse a ella en un momento de la noche para "decirme que si no quería fotografiar la velada, no pasaba nada".

"Me dijo: 'deja la cámara, relájate, diviértete. Estás aquí como invitada. Disfrútalo'", afirmó la fotógrafa, que pese a la invitación no pudo resistir la tentación de capturar lo que veía.

"Siendo fotógrafa y estando rodeada de tanta belleza, con el lugar y todos esos invitados despampanantes, no podía parar, así que hice fotos toda la noche y hasta la mañana", dijo.

"La noche fue excitante, absolutamente extraordinaria. Durante el día, la jornada fue maravillosa, fue algo muy relajante, excitante y espectacular, pero la noche fue casi más mágica", agregó Pilkington, que aseguró que durmió mal durante semanas antes de la boda, consciente de la responsabilidad que tenía en el gran día.

La fotógrafo comenzó su trabajo en el momento en que los novios volvieron a entrar en el palacio de Buckingham tras salir al balcón y besarse en dos ocasiones ante la multitud, momento en el que se inició la parte privada de la boda de Guillermo y Catalina.

Pilkington señaló que lo ella pudo ver en la parte pública de la boda y en la privada es que "estuvieron atraídos el uno a otro durante toda la jornada de una manera magnética".

"El amor que se tienen es muy evidente. Todo el mundo pudo verlo. Se veía que están hechos el uno para el otro", afirmó.

Le sorprendió especialmente la calma que Catalina mantuvo durante el día pese a tener encima los ojos de cientos de millones de personas que vieron la boda por televisión en todo el mundo.

"Estaba tan relajada e impresionante (...). En todo momento, dejó un aire de tranquilidad y serenidad", comentó Pilkington, que destacó por encima de todo unas fotografías que hizo de la pareja en una de las salas de palacio: "son unas fotos adorables, informales e íntimas, que espero que guardarán para siempre como algo especial".

Ninguna de estas fotos de Pilkington se harán públicas.

Paralelamente, Clarence House, la residencia del príncipe Carlos, difundió las primeras fotografías oficiales de la boda, entre las que destacan un retrato de cuerpo entero de la pareja, una junto a los siete pajes y la instantánea con las dos familias al completo.

Las cadenas británicas de televisión BBC y ITV informaron hoy de que la audiencia en el Reino Unido fue de 24 millones de personas.

Tony Award nominee Kate Baldwin and her husband, actor Graham Rowat, are now parents of a baby boy, Colin. Baldwin received a Tony nomination for Finian's Rainbow. Her many stage credits include Thoroughly Modern Millie, South Pacific, She Loves Me, and A Little Night Music. Rowat's...

Writing and photography by Millie Kerr I ate my weight in tacos while indulging at San Antonio’s Tex-Mex eateries, many of them tiny establishments with funny hours and never-before-seen menu items. Brightly colored signs adorn childhood favorites, where I customarily ordered “an enchilada, rice and beans” before developing culinary curiosity. Such affinities endure but are now joined by chalupas compuesta; enchiladas verdes; puffy tacos; tamales smothered ...

 Millie is truly the horse of a different color. She is a beautiful strawberry roan filly and is incredibly sweet and quiet. She has a gorgeous blue eye with dark eye liner and pretty head and neck. She is in training under saddle and is extremely athletic and a pretty mover. She is bred and built to be a great show horse prospect or great on the trail. Millie clips, lunges, cross-ties, trailers and has an incredibly willing attitude about anything asked of her. She is an enjoyable horse to work with. I have her parents on the ranch for you to view. Others also available all ages and prices for sale or lease. Come visit and see for yourself!

engrish funny - Looking Forward to Other Next Tomorrow

Perhaps I love this Parisian inspired photo shoot so much because I’m French. Or perhaps I love it so much because I could live off of bread and cheese. And cake (especially the amazing ruffled one below). But I’m sure the real reason I love it is because of the amazingly talented artistes of Millie Holloman [...]

Get ready for more juicy drama unfolding around Melanie's secret abortion, Malik's up/down spiral and relationship with Jenna, Derwin's sneaky moves or the new QB, and Tasha's crazy love life.  Because the cast of BET's "The Game" just got the gift of renewal.

 

Deets on the show's upcoming 5th season when you read on....

The season ended with some serious cliffhangers. And thankfully we get to see them play out.  BET just renewed its most popular show on the network for 22 new episodes.  

"The Game," which debuted its 4th season on BET this year, raked in a record breaking 7.7 millie viewers for its season premiere.  And the numbers stayed uber high all season with 3 to 4 million viewers per episode.

Filming of "The Game" will continue in Atlanta with production of the fifth season starting soon.  The show is created and directed by YBF couple Salim & Mara Brock Akil.

In other good news for the channel, the new scripted show "Let's Stay Together" also received 22 new episodes for a second season.

Congrats all around!

The Randomness:

1.  In sad tv news, ABC has decided to cancel the longest running soaps on tv, "All My Children" and "One Life To Live."  Their last episodes will air the end of 2011 and January 2012.  It's the end of an era.  Damn homie...

WONDERLAND. A New Alice. A New Musical stars Janet Dacal In The Heights as Alice, Darren Ritchie Little Shop of Horrors, Thoroughly Modern Millie as Jack the White Knight, E. Clayton Cornelious The Scottsboro Boys, A Chorus Line as Caterpillar, Jose Llana Spelling Bee, Flower Drum Song as El Gato, Karen Mason Hairspray, Mamma Mia as The Queen of Hearts, Kate Shindle Legally Blonde, Cabaret, Jekyll and Hyde as The Mad Hatter, Carly Rose Sonenclar Les Miserables, Little House on the Prairie as Chloe, Edward Staudenmayer Spamalot, Martin Short Fame Becomes Me as The White Rabbit and Danny Stiles Regional productions of Guys and Dolls and Sister Act The Musical as Morris the March Hare. With a book by Gregory Boyd and Jack Murphy, lyrics by Jack Murphy, music by Frank Wildhorn, choreography by Marguerite Derricks and direction by Gregory Boyd, WONDERLAND will open at Broadway's Marquis Theatre 1535 Broadway between 45th amp 46th Streets on Sunday, April 17, 2011, and performances began Monday, March 21.

Michelle Williams stars in a bleak, enigmatic and masterful western about families on the Oregon trail

Kelly Reichardt's gaunt, mysterious and superbly calibrated movie about pioneers and the old American west appears to have come from another age – from the early days of Malick or Antonioni. When I saw it again in London last week, the print itself was worn, speckling the images with lines and scratches, and reinforcing the weird sense that we were watching   a rediscovered classic.

Reichardt's film-making palette is determined by the parched, scorched landscape and the grim faces of those travelling across it. It is a world of tough browns and ochres, pale greys; the blue of the sky is bleached out with glare and haze. And with its long, silent takes (music is used sparingly on the soundtrack), it is a film which compels you to examine the details. For the first 10 minutes, it is entirely wordless, and long stretches will go by in which you can hear only the repeated whine of the wagon wheels as the pioneers grimly trudge along, rather like the squeaky wind-wheel in the famous opening of Sergio Leone's Once Upon a Time in the West. Sometimes, this sound is only just audible above the roar of the wind across the plains.

We join the story as three 19th-century pioneer families are struggling along the desolate Oregon trail; they have evidently been persuaded to break away from the main column on the promise of a short cut. Now they are hopelessly lost. They travel mostly on foot, leading their horses to save energy and water, their wagons, containing precious barrels of water, pulled by oxen.

As reserves of water run low, Reichardt shows the pilgrims gazing into the barrels, and implying their despair as they can easily make out the whorls and knots of wood at the bottom. Their leaders are Soloman and Emily Tetherow, played by Will Patton and Michelle Williams; they are the most mature and commonsensical of the party, and the ones who feel most grimly the calamity of having struck out on their own. Their taciturn friends William and Glory White are played by Neal Huff and Shirley Henderson, and Paul Dano and Zoe Kazan play Thomas and Millie Gately, a couple with a tendency to foolishness and panic, too easily spooked by problems, too easily excited by promises of rich farmland or gold prospecting.

But the most extraordinary of the party is Stephen Meek, tremendously played by Bruce Greenwood: a man with the clothes and manner of a huckster or fairground barker. He looks as if he should be the star of some itinerant Wild West show, like Frank James or "Wild" Bill Hickok. Hehas been employed as their guide. He has persuaded these poor souls to follow him, and his gift of the gab simply never lets up: always joking, wisecracking, pontificating, speculating. His sheer torrent of words is almost bizarrely at odds with the utter silence of the landscape and the film itself. Even when it is entirely plain that they are lost, the water is running out and that he has led them astray, Meek never admits defeat. His optimism is enigmatic. Is he keeping up a brave front? Or is it a kind of pathology, an inability to see the truth? The kind of pathology, in fact, that all pioneers need?

The pioneers' restlessness and panic is compounded when they capture a Native American of the Cayuse tribe (Ron Rondeaux) and decide to keep him as prisoner so that he can be their guide. Meek urges the group to hang this dangerous savage before he slaughters them, perhaps trying to find a diversionary focus for their growing, murderous rage, and all too well aware that his employers are deciding whether or not to hang the slippery Meek himself, suspecting some kind of treachery. And so the group forges onward, the balance of power shifting subtly and inexorably to the Cayuse, as they trudge into an existential unknown.

Quietly and firmly, Williams exerts her own authority as a performer over this film: her character is the one who sees their predicament most clearly, together with Meek's role in it and their own consequent culpability for allowing themselves to be bamboozled. Perhaps the most powerful moment in the film is when she comes face to face with the Cayuse out in the scrub while the menfolk are away. After he retreats behind the horizon, she scurries back to the wagon, and trembling with fear and determination, loads and fires their rifle into their air: the pre-arranged alarm signal. It is a moment of non-violent violence, a premonition of confrontation and fear.

This man's presence is blazingly vivid in its alienness, almost extra-terrestrial, and the movie itself shimmers on the brink of some kind of mass hallucination. The pioneers are horrified at this Native American, and by their own inability to understand anything about him; they are convulsed at Meek's dark warnings of the native's legendary scalpings and savagery. His callous, swaggeringly explicit descriptions of this are reminiscent, but in contrast to, John Wayne's reticent horror and fury at the same practices in a very different film, John Ford's The Searchers ("What do you want me to do? Draw you a picture?")

There is a comparable sense of an embattled, frightened expeditionary force, out of food and water, and ideas: without the experience, resources or language to understand someone who may be their destroyer or their only hope of survival. This superbly made, austere film is Reichardt's best yet, certainly a huge advance on her previous work, Wendy and Lucy (2008) and a powerful new addition to the western genre.

Rating: 4/5

WONDERLAND. A New Alice. A New Musical stars Janet Dacal In The Heights as Alice, Darren Ritchie Little Shop of Horrors, Thoroughly Modern Millie as Jack the White Knight, E. Clayton Cornelious The Scottsboro Boys, A Chorus Line as Caterpillar, Jose Llana Spelling Bee, Flower Drum Song as El Gato, Karen Mason Hairspray, Mamma Mia as The Queen of Hearts, Kate Shindle Legally Blonde, Cabaret, Jekyll and Hyde as The Mad Hatter, Carly Rose Sonenclar Les Miserables, Little House on the Prairie as Chloe, Edward Staudenmayer Spamalot, Martin Short Fame Becomes Me as The White Rabbit and Danny Stiles Regional productions of Guys and Dolls and Sister Act The Musical as Morris the March Hare. With a book by Gregory Boyd and Jack Murphy, lyrics by Jack Murphy, music by Frank Wildhorn, choreography by Marguerite Derricks and direction by Gregory Boyd, WONDERLAND will open at Broadway's Marquis Theatre 1535 Broadway between 45th amp 46th Streets on Sunday, April 17, 2011. Click below for a complete sneak peek of the production onstage

A New Alice. A New Musical stars Janet Dacal In The Heights as Alice, Darren Ritchie Little Shop of Horrors, Thoroughly Modern Millie as Jack the White Knight, E. Clayton Cornelious The Scottsboro Boys, A Chorus Line as Caterpillar, Jose Llana Spelling Bee, Flower Drum Song as El Gato, Karen Mason Hairspray, Mamma Mia as The Queen of Hearts, Kate Shindle Legally Blonde, Cabaret, Jekyll and Hyde as The Mad Hatter, Carly Rose Sonenclar Les Miserables, Little House on the Prairie as Chloe, Edward Staudenmayer Spamalot, Martin Short Fame Becomes Me as The White Rabbit and Danny Stiles Regional productions of Guys and Dolls and Sister Act The Musical as Morris the March Hare. With a book by Gregory Boyd and Jack Murphy, lyrics by Jack Murphy, music by Frank Wildhorn, choreography by Marguerite Derricks and direction by Gregory Boyd, WONDERLAND will open at Broadway's Marquis Theatre 1535 Broadway between 45th amp 46th Streets on Sunday, April 17, 2011, and performances began Monday, March 21.

Home Decorators Collection drops a selection of pitchers to $15.99 and up. Plus, shipping for these items is free. Check out the Maude Pitcher (pictured), which falls from $44 to $29.99, and the Millie Pitcher, which lowers from $24 to $15.99. Also take a look at the Matilde Pitcher, originally $34, now $22.99. Sales tax is charged in states with Home Depot retail locations.

All images via Flickr user Millie Motts. Ah, April—the month when the suns finally rolls out of bed, and one can practically taste the summer on their lips. Soon, we’ll all be gallivanting around in short sleeves and sunning up a storm in swimsuits. And the sooner summer shows up, the better, because the sight [...]

A New Alice. A New Musical stars Janet Dacal In The Heights as Alice, Darren Ritchie Little Shop of Horrors, Thoroughly Modern Millie as Jack the White Knight, E. Clayton Cornelious The Scottsboro Boys, A Chorus Line as Caterpillar, Jose Llana Spelling Bee, Flower Drum Song as El Gato, Karen Mason Hairspray, Mamma Mia as The Queen of Hearts, Kate Shindle Legally Blonde, Cabaret, Jekyll and Hyde as The Mad Hatter, Carly Rose Sonenclar Les Miserables, Little House on the Prairie as Chloe, Edward Staudenmayer Spamalot, Martin Short Fame Becomes Me as The White Rabbit and Danny Stiles Regional productions of Guys and Dolls and Sister Act The Musical as Morris the March Hare. With a book by Gregory Boyd and Jack Murphy, lyrics by Jack Murphy, music by Frank Wildhorn, choreography by Marguerite Derricks and direction by Gregory Boyd, WONDERLAND will open at Broadway's Marquis Theatre 1535 Broadway between 45th amp 46th Streets on Sunday, April 17, 2011, and performances began Monday, March 21.

Mildred Carter ~ born on June 13, 1922 in San Francisco, passed away on Thursday, March 31, 2011 at a hospital in Millbrae, California. She was married to and divorced from Ken Howie… Now, what am I to do about our annual holiday luncheon, when we shared our wine secrets and talked about our daughters… [...]

At 85 years young, Millie Garfield is one of the Internet's oldest bloggers, according to The Ageless Project.

Photo Credit: Michael Brosilow

So the other night two young women sat behind my partner and I when we went to see Steppenwolf Theatre Company's production of The Hot L Baltimore, Lanford Wilson's 1973 play about the residents of a decaying hotel. One of them confessed to loving the musical, Cats, and she also thought Puppetry of the Penis, in which two nude men contort their genitalia into various shapes, was one of the best shows she'd ever seen. However, she did not care much for any of the characters in Baltimore, which she found boring. Her friend, on the other hand, admitted during the intermission that she liked the characters in the play - but she did not comment on Cats or the Penis show. That old cliché, "different strokes for different folks", proved to be true that evening, and director Tina Landau's moody, mysterious and musical production of Wilson's play will certainly not be - to use another cliché - "everyone's cup of tea". But since I liked it, I thought I would share my five reasons for going to see The Hot L Baltimore:

1) Kate Arrington and de'Adre Aziza: These two amazing actresses steal the show as prostitutes Suzy and April. I loved Arrington in Steppenwolf's production of Detroit last fall, and she is equally as good in Baltimore - especially in Act 2 when Suzy makes a life-changing decision. Aziza, who was nominated for a Tony in 2008 for the musical, Passing Strange, makes a memorable Steppenwolf debut as the sassy, seen-it-all April, who has the most amusing lines in the show. She also gets to share her lovely singing voice with a brief rendition of Roberta Flack's 1972 hit, "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face".

2) Sean Allan Krill: This engaging actor plays the most fascinating character in Baltimore - a mysterious man dressed in a suit who observes everyone else and occasionally bursts into song. Landau has added this new character to the play for thematic reasons - and it worked for me. Also, Krill's vocal talents are always nice to hear.

3) The Ensemble Cast: The entire cast of 14 is excellent, and they all work so well together in creating the world of the play. I was especially impressed by the performances of Jon Michael Hall, Namir Smallwood, Allison Torem, Jacqueline Williams and the wonderful Molly Regan as Millie, a retired waitress, whom I easily could've listened to tell stories all night long.

4) James Schuette's Scenic Design: His seedy two-story hotel couldn't be better. And at the end of the play, my partner turned to me and said, "It makes me want to go visit old buildings", which is high praise coming from an architecture buff.

5) The Marvelous Attention to Detail: From the first moment the audience walks into the theater, it's 1973 all over again. The music from an onstage radio plays Sly & the Family Stone's "Everyday People" and Stevie Wonder's "Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours". The old TV set features a CBS promo for all the network's classic series like All in the Family, Maude, Carol Burnett, Bob Newhart and, of course, Mary Tyler Moore. And Ana Kuzmanic's retro costumes for all the characters are perfect.

As for the play, people come and go, quarrel and throw stuff, strum guitars and sing songs, dance around and drink champagne, remember the past and wonder about the uncertain future - it's a slice-of-life character study that I enjoyed watching. You would never want to live there, but The Hot L Baltimore is definitely a place worth visiting.

The Hot L Baltimore runs through May 29 in Steppenwolf's Downstairs Theatre (1650 N. Halsted). For tickets and further information, call the box office at 312-335-1650 or go to www.steppenwolf.org. Below you can take a look into the rehearsal process for the play with director Tina Landau.

Every birthday is special but when you hit a number like "70" it's really special.

Our blogging friend, Ronni Bennett, from "Times Goes By" is observing her birthday today.


Happy Birthday Cake. Photo by freakgirl cc by-nc-nd

I had the good fortune to discover Ronni's blog soon after I started blogging, what a find that was!

She was writing about what it was like to get older, in a serious way and sometimes in a humorous way.

At other times Ronni writes about issues that are important to seniors. She also writes about her work and life experiences - so interesting!

To this day, she writes about all of the above and once in while throws in a surprise post. I love those!!

After following her for some time, I really felt I knew her. That's the way it is, when you read someone's blog for a while you really "do know" them.

I have only met a handful of bloggers and one of them happens to be Ronni. When she lived on the East Coast we met for lunch one day and it was like meeting an old friend.


Ronni and Millie

If you haven't read her blog, go visit and discover a great lady.

If you are one of the lucky ones who reads her blog, go over and wish her a happy birthday!

From “The Pin” by Katrina Solano: Millie looked down and straightened her model pin affectionately. The pin was the one constant in Millie’s outfits. She never went a day without it. Do you have a signature accessory that could represent you and your style, like in Katrina’s short story? Let us know, then read the [...]

EXCLUSIVE: Cheyenne Jackson, who has been recurring on NBC’s 30 Rock and on Fox’s Glee, has signed with ICM. Jackson, best known for his extensive Broadway resume, which includes stints in Finian's Rainbow, Aida, Thoroughly Modern Millie and Xanadu, recently completed the indie The Green and will guest on the upcoming season of HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm. Jackson, who was at Innovative, continues to be managed by Courtney Kivowitz at The Schiff Co.

Here’s an audition notice for “Thoroughly Modern Millie” from the Bay Street Players: (Eustis, FL)…Bay Street Players will hold auditions for the Tony Award-winning musical Thoroughly Modern Millie on April 18th & 19th at 7:30PM at 109 N. Bay Street, Eustis.  Artistic Director David Clevinger and Musical Director Beau Mahurin are looking to fill a cast [...]

To appreciate Lockhart BBQ, one must try at least two of its famed establishments.

My inner prankster took a hiatus, finally revived last April when I found myself working amidst fellow jokesters. We worked together, and against one another, to devise several office pranks that would make Jim Halpert proud.

Millie Brown vomits a range of colored liquids onto a canvas while two classical singers perform. You can buy these pieces for £1,500.

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Checkout Lane: Relief in taxing times Du Quoin Evening Call Millie Tobolsky, standing, and daughter Irene Wachsler work with personal and business accounting clients. Wednesday, March 23, 2011. By Shaunna Gately Using a certified public accountant or enrolled agent is a good way to know that your finances will ... and more »

 MFB Night Time Affair (Millie) is the sweetest horse you will find, she would sit in your lap if she could. I have owed her since she was a year old and have been training her for the last 3 years. She is broke to saddle, but will need an experienced rider. Millie has champion blood lines. Sire is MFB Night Time Echo and Dam is Fancie Affair. She is by far the smartest horse I have ever had or trained, she will be very easy to train to your liking. She would make an awesome english or western horse. I started her under an english saddle and she has done really well! She is at a training barn now, waiting for a new home with you!

Filed under: Baby Names

The Brits are often a little ahead of us when it comes to baby name trends, and they were the first to start reviving old-fashioned, Victorian-era "nickname" names, especially for girls.

On the current British popularity list of girls' names, for example, Evie, Ellie, Millie, Alfie and Archie all rank high.

We are looking back, as well, particularly to some girls' names that haven't been heard for generations. Many of them, like Lottie, have a nostalgic, golden-locket charm. There are others, like Billie and Charlie, that have a boyish edge.

Here are some nicknames that are now eligible for birth certificates, plus the more formal full girls' names that spawned them:

ADDIE-Adeline
AGGIE-Agatha
EDIE-Edith
EVIE-Evelyn
GRACIE-Grace
HATTIE-Harriet
JOSIE-Josephine
KITTY-Katherine
LETTY--Letitia
LIBBY-Elizabeth
LIVVY-Olivia
LOTTIE--Charlotte
MADDIE, MADDY-Madeline
MAMIE-Mary
MILLIE, MILLY-Mildred, Millicent
MINNIE--Minerva
NELLIE-Eleanor, Helen
TILLIE-Matilda
WINNIE--Winifred

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Post by Gabrielle Blair

Intense colors can be surprisingly scary to use in a room. So I'm always impressed when someone goes bold with a color palette. And this nursery from Sharon Taylor certainly delivers.

The first thing that caught my eye was definitely the green striped ceiling. Most of us think of putting pattern on the walls but as a decorator, Sharon thinks a little differently. Those stripes draw the eye up and help make sure the sparkly chandelier catches your eye. I'm sure it makes an impression to anyone walking into the room.

See more of the bold details below.

Creativity must run in the family because Sharon's sister, Millie Johnson, custom made this charming wall art. She used old crate boxes, suitcase lids (so clever!), and other little bits found in flea markets. I love the hippo who appears to be gazing over the room.

The faux bois lamp was another great find that helped complete the room. It was painted bright blue and the nesting dolls were added for a little whimsy.

We could all take tips from Sharon's styling of this bookcase. Painting the inside a pretty shade of green really makes the playful items stand out. And did you notice the disco balls sitting on top? Fun! 

I can't forget to mention the great canopy. Sharon designed it herself and says that after she found the fabric (for a bargain $5.99/yd), it defined the palette for the rest of the room. She also made the drapes reversible so the family had options for their use in the future. 

Sharon said her client wanted a nursery that felt magical. What do you think, did Sharon deliver? What do you think of the unusual color palette?

For more of Sharon's work, visit her site and blog. 

Hannah Hurlbert had several jobs to do as the anesthesiologist on an operation to remove the gall bladder of a 40-year-old woman named Millie Smith.

Checkout Lane: Relief in taxing times Milford Daily News Millie Tobolsky, standing, and daughter Irene Wachsler work with personal and business accounting clients. Wednesday, March 23, 2011. By Shaunna Gately Using a certified public accountant or enrolled agent is a good way to know that your finances will ... Checkout Lane: Relief in taxing timesChillicothe Constitution Tribune all 90 news articles »

Hannah Hurlbert had several jobs to do as the anesthesiologist on an operation to remove the gall bladder of a 40-year-old woman named Millie Smith.

I’m posting early because I’m traveling tomorrow.

Oops! Erin Edwards, you commented on Jenna Royal’s question from last week when she asked it in February, and I intended to include your comment along with my own response, but I didn’t look far enough down my list to see it. I agreed entirely, so here it is: @ Jenna Royal - while you're waiting for Ms. Levine's post on pacing, you might find it interesting to try to read Inkheart again and figure out *why* the romance change didn't work for you. What little insights could have made it easier for you to believe? Like did you need a little hint that she was starting to get dissatisfied before she dumped the first boyfriend and how many times does that need to be mentioned and how early?

And I had promised a post on pacing and didn’t get to it. I am getting to it now in response to this from Caitlin Flowers on March 4, 2011: I have trouble pacing my stories. I'd enjoy writing action or an important moment for the characters more than writing the necessary slower scenes to give the reader a chance to keep up. Do you have any suggestions?

Seems to me there’s more than one question here, if I’m understanding right. There’s balancing high-action scenes and low-action scenes, and there’s fitting information in that the reader needs to know. I’ve written some about the latter in my post on flashbacks on May 5, 2010, so you may want to take a look.

But here’s some more. I’ve said this before too. We don’t want Millie to say to her brother Noah, “Remember the day Mom and Dad split up and we had to come here to live?” She wouldn’t say this unless Noah has amnesia and she’s checking to see if his memory has come back. Of course he remembers, but the reader doesn’t know. The dialogue is artificial; it’s manufactured solely to clue the reader in.

However, there’s nothing wrong with conveying information in direct narration. Say Noah is making dinner for his younger sister, which he’s had to do since the separation, whether they’re staying with their mom or their dad. He can think something like, I was trying my hand at frittatas. I never even made toast when Mom and Dad were together. I felt lousy when they split up, but cooking was cool.  The narration can stop there or continue on to, I wished we still had the island from our old kitchen. Mom’s whole apartment wasn’t much bigger than that island. Dad’s wasn’t a lot larger, and his kitchen was just a wall at one end of the living room. The reader gains an impression of the setting and learns that both parents have less money now.

You don’t need a whole scene to convey information; you can just tuck it in here and there in narration in whatever POV you're using.

Onto pacing. I’ve been having a pacing problem in my new mystery. Without giving much away, night is coming. Elodie can spend it in a cottage with her parents or in the stable with her employer, the dragon Meenore, and there has to be some discussion about which it will be. I had a stomachache over how boring the conversation was going to be, a malady I’ve been experiencing often in writing this book. It got so bad that I sent my manuscript so far to my editor for her feedback.

I’ve never ever before sent in a partial manuscript. Ordinarily I like my editor to come fresh to the entire thing. This was an act of desperation. You may have read on the blog that I’ve started this book over four times, and each time an alarm has gone off in my mind that it wasn’t right. My editor wrote back that she thinks the trouble sinking the book is that the danger hanging over the story is too abstract and not nearly immediate enough to engage the reader. Wonderful editor that she is, she suggested a solution that may do the trick.

Naturally, I’m going to have to go back to the beginning again.

Of course I’m lucky. Because I’m published and my editor has edited several of my books, I can avail myself of her help. If you’re just getting started, you’ll have to rely for manuscript first aid on critique buddies, teachers, librarians, and the good readers in your lives.

Caitlin Flowers and others with pacing issues, you may have the same problem I do. The action and the big character scenes bring the story temporarily to life, but the in-between segments fall flat because there isn’t enough overall for the reader to worry about.

I got it right in Ella Enchanted. As long as Ella is under the curse of obedience, the reader is going to stay engaged. I can get away with a relaxed scene here and there, like the scene with the elves. Nothing earthshattering happens, but the reader meets these charming creatures and gets a break from the tension. Such relief heightens the scenes that are full of action or feeling. If a story is constant crisis, it plateaus and the high points don’t stand out. It’s like listening to loud music; there can never be a crescendo. You may know someone who gets upset over the smallest thing. When genuine trouble comes along, he lacks emotional range.

A variety of kinds of scenes livens up a story. Unless the tale demands it, move your characters to different locations. If Noah and Millie, for example, have been in the kitchen for a few pages, move them into the backyard or, better yet, to school. After they’ve been alone together for a while, separate them or bring in another character. End a scene and start the next one in a different place or at a later time. If you’re writing from an omniscient third person POV, switch over to entirely different characters for the next scene.

If you can, also alternate the kinds of scene. In Ella Enchanted again, there are romantic scenes with Char and conflict-filled scenes with Hattie and Olive and scary scenes with ogres and I-don’t-know-what-kind of scenes with Mandy.

Most important of all, the reader has to care about the main character. By now I know a lot of writing tricks (which I’m sharing as they come up), but nothing works if the reader doesn’t care. Take Noah. He may be misguided and may be handling his parents’ separation badly. We may groan at his idiotic attempts to repair his family and himself. We’ll even endure when he hurts his sister Millie as long as he isn’t callous, as long as we can connect with his humanity and see our own flawed selves in him. We’ll put up with a slow scene or two (since no book is perfect), if Noah has a firm grip on our feelings and our imaginations.

Here are two prompts:

•    Noah is in the kitchen with his sister, Millie, while their mother is on her first date since the breakup. Sister and brother are reacting according to their separate natures. Mix dialogue with action in writing the scene. Be sensitive to your own intuition about when the situation is starting to drag. Change something to wake the story up again - the location, the characters. The phone can ring or one of them can get a text message. Some cooking catastrophe can occur. Whatever. If you like, keep writing.

•    This is a battle scene. A troop of elves is holding their mountain keep against an attack of trolls. In the midst of action-action-action, work in a soft, feeling moment between two characters. Then return to the action.

Have fun and save what you write!

Millie is a 5 month old puppy with a lot of energy. She loves to play tug-o-war and hide our socks under the bed. She loves to get into trouble, but

An important thing I’ve learned about writing on the Internet is that 98 out of 100 people reading your work live in the U.S. Northeast. That seems like an exaggeration, but nope, it’s all New York, Pennsylvania, D.C., New England. Person 99 lives in Los Angeles and is usually too busy with “life stuff” to read your stuff, and person 100 is my Mom doing Farmville on Facebook. That’s it. When the Internet finally expands to the Midwest, it is going to be pretty cool (read: boring).

With that said, today’s Guide to Recognizing Your Mascots covers the New York-Penn League, a league so white and privileged that Williamsport, Pennsylvania, gets a team. Williamsport is totally the mid-Idaho of Pennsylvania. You’ve got Pittsburgh to your left and Philadelphia to your right (or vice versa, depending on which way you’re standing). Pick a direction and live there. The league is divided into the McNamara Division, the Pinckney Division and the Stedler Division, but I don’t know what any of those words mean so I just glossed over that.

In case you’ve missed the previous installments, please peruse your Pioneer, Appalachian and Northwest Leagues before continuing. When you’re ready, please click through to continue.

I appreciate a minor league mascot that requires children to know about the periodic table of elements. Ferrous follows in the footsteps of such greats as Uranium, the Fightin’ Primordial Radionuclide of the Albuquerque Isotopes and “Boron,” the mascot for Major League Soccer. For the uninformed, Ferrous (Fe2+) is derived from the Latin word “ferrum,” meaning “iron.” Ever wonder why your favorite carnival ride is called a “ferris wheel?” Because it is made of iron. Ferrous the mascot is a bird, because an airplane would make a pretty sh:tty mascot for a baseball team. Also, that thing about Uranium was a joke, as the Albuquerque Isotopes are nowhere near that funny.

As for the origin of the name, the mascot’s bio page (which also lists “peanut butter and mayo sandwiches” as his favorite food… what the hell?) tells the story:

Ferrous, the official mascot of the Aberdeen IronBirds has been with the team since 2002. He was named by Glenn Dudderar of Aberdeen, MD. Glenn was one of thousands of fans who entered The Baltimore Sun’s Name the Mascot Contest.

Other names that almost won: Homer, Champ, Slugger, Blooper, Boomer, Home Run, Base Hit, Southpaw, VORPie, Homer, Double the Improperly Bred Bovine and, for some reason, “Orbit.” The IronBirds have a second mascot named “Ripcord,” but that is a G.I. Joe and I am not dignifying that thing’s existence with a response.

The Auburn Doubledays and their mascot, Abner, are named after Abner Doubleday the Civil War general and Auburn native credited with inventing the game of baseball. As Ken Burns’ Baseball taught us, Doubleday had nothing to do with baseball and got credit because it looked good on paper, sort of like Arianna Huffington getting put in charge of AOL. The Doubledays never bothered to change their names, so they play in the New York-Penn League as sort of a living Columbus Day. I guess it’s surprising how close they came to being the Auburn Major General George G. Meadies.

So, let’s address the fact that this mascot is a HORRIBLE LOOKING MAN. The one on the left. I feel like maybe when your mascot is “human being” you should, Greendale Community College excluded, go with the Big Furry Muppet Nothing. Or have a boring historical type in period clothing standing at the gates of your park as Abner Doubleday, doing the Hall of Presidents thing to people as they enter.

Or better yet, correct your history! I know I’d like to see a horse mascot named “Cartwright.”

Next we have the mascot of the Batavia Scooby Doo Exhibitionist Santa Clauses, Homer. Oh, I’m sorry, that thing is supposed to be a “Muckdog.” Prior to the 1997 season, the Muckdogs were called the Batavia Clippers, and a fan poll picked both the current name and logo. A Google search of “what is a Muckdog?” in quotations or “what the hell is a Muckdog” bring you to an Answers.com page explaining that a Muckdog “a friendly warm blooded creature that wants you to watch him/her play baseball/softball!” Ugh, f**k you, Answers.com.

Homer is the most difficult mascot I’ve had to research so far for a couple of reasons. One, if you search for “Batavia Muckdogs Homer” you get the results of every Batavia game featuring a home run ever played. And I mean that’s only like four results, but still. Two, every good picture of Homer is obscured by watermarks and crazy graphics by what I can only assume to be a local Batavia photography firm, feverishly watching over their Google Alert for “Batavia Muckdogs Homer” in case somebody wants to be funny about mascots on the Internet. So hey, Homer doesn’t always wear a trench coat, he wears a baseball uniform, but I guess you’re never gonna get to see it.

Are you tired of reading the word “Muckdogs” yet?

I don’t ever want my observations to sound forced. When I see a bird mascot, what am I supposed to say? “Oh man, look at this BIRD! What were they thinking.” Sometimes the team and the actor get it right. So for a situation like this, I hand it over to Jason Fry of the exceptional Faith and Fear in Flushing for his take on Brooklyn Cyclones mascot Sandy the Seagull.

Mascots are one of the only things the Mets have gotten right: Mr. Met has a certain Zen that’s agreeable, particularly when the alternative is thinking about Madoff and Omar Minaya.

But the class of the organization, mascot-wise, is Sandy the Seagull of the Brooklyn Cyclones. Sandy’s rotund and wears goofy sandals, but he’s a recognizable creature, in colors found on Earth. Whoever created him didn’t try too hard. (To see what happens when a pack of marketing stooges take an eh idea and screw it up, see the Staten Island Yankees’ stupid mascot, Scooter the Holy Cow.) Sandy’s a roly-poly bird in a baseball uniform. It ain’t that hard, folks.

Sandy’s hint of shambling Lebowski charm also fits nicely with the Cyclones’ cheerfully bush-league vibe, which mixes Coney Island carny-barking with a certain gruff Brooklyn simplicity. Really, he’s how a mascot should be done.

[Faith and Fear]

By the way, go there and read everything. Fry is one of my very favorite writers and his take on anything is better than mine. Except maybe Star Wars. I think I know more about Star Wars.

The Connecticut Tigers are the New York-Penn League affiliate of the Cleveland Indians. No, I’m kidding, it’s the Tigers, but you can barely tell. I’m pretty sure the Staten Island Yankees are an affiliate of the Detroit Lions. Anyway, C.T. (named after his state’s abbreviation and his team name, making his full name either Connecticut Tiger or Connecticut Tigers Tiger) looks and acts exactly like his Major League counterpart “Paws.” I’d make a joke about them being related and the nature of tigers and their young in the wild, but after learning about the Phillie Phanatic’s Japanese cousin “Slyly” I’m afraid to make jokes about anything.

C.T.’s official page seems desperate:

If you are interested in having “C.T. the Tiger” at your special event, please let us know. He is available for birthday parties, grand openings, company picnics, parades, community events, and other events to stir-up excitement for you and your organization or business.

I guess having a career after the Real World is hard. The Westboro Baptist Church should pay C.T. to stir-up some excitement at their next gay, famous or nice person funeral picket.

Here are some good mascot ideas if your team name is the “Renegades”

1. A guy who dresses like or pretends to be the Ultimate Warrior
2. A handsome, framed cop on the run on a motorcycle with an Indian guy in his sidecar
3. Warren Zevon
4. a jeep

Bad ideas

1. A family of raccoons that live under the stadium

According to Wikipedia, this is the full rundown of the family. “Rookie the Renegade Raccoon” is the primary mascot, joined by “Rascal,” Rookie’s son, and “Rufus,” Rookie’s father. Rookie used to have a wife named “Rene Gade” (not a joke) but that ended badly. Rookie’s rival it seems had broken his dreams by stealing the girl of his fancy. So Rookie showed up at a game equipped with a gun to shoot off this guy’s legs, but ended up getting shot himself. Which sucks, because it was Gideon’s Bible Night.

Okay, that part was a joke.

hahahahah

This picture poses so many questions. Among them, why is Grape Ape the mascot of a baseball team? Do they have a second little dog mascot that follows him around in a van? Why are his eyes stuck together like that? Why is a baseball team named the “Jammers?” Is it because they make jam in Jamestown? If so, was Jamestown originally named Jamstown? Is it grape jam? Is that why they have grapes on the hat? If it’s a jelly-themed team, why is their mascot a monkey, and if they play in the New York-Penn League why is his name BUBBA? Why is Bubba standing beside Abraham Lincoln? Why is Abraham Lincoln elderly and Hispanic? And why is he making that face at me?

Apparently it used to be worse. Their original mascot was the Tazmanian Devil. I am not sh:tting you. They only changed the logo to a bunch of grapes in 2006 after twelve years of people asking them what the hell a “Jammer” was. And one of the other names in the contest to name the team was the “Furniture Makers.” How awesome would that be? A big chair with googly eyes.

And hey kids, come around back behind the stadium and meet the Analigator!

“Did you know the Lowell Spinners became proud parents of Canaligator on January 19, 1996? He was born in the Canals of Lowell, getting his name from the nearly sox-miles of canals in Lowell. After just a few days in the canals, Canaligator crawled up the banks and over to LeLacheur Park where he has been ever since. During the off-season, Canaligator can be seen throughout the Merrimack Valley, frequently visiting schools, hospitals, day care centers and more. While his favorite past-time is baseball, Canaligator has never met a camera he didn’t want to smile for or a child he didn’t want to hug or high-five.”

During the off-season, Canaligator loves to climb up through your toilet and high-five you in the asshole! I’m not sure why a yarn-themed team needed a Roger Corman SyFy Channel beast from the canals as their mascot, but they don’t just have one, they have several. They have Canaligator’s wife “Allie Gator” (suggesting that the Canaligator had to at least be married if he was going to be Godless around the children) and their daughter Millie. Having two female mascots gives you a 1000% chance of seeing “she’ll never tell!!” or “it’s not polite to ask a lady!!” in their vital stats. Mascot creators LOVE the idea that women are uncomfortable with their weight. She can f**k an alligator, but she can’t tell me how much she weighs. All right.

The one on the left. We aren’t talking about Slider yet. Yes, the mascot of the Cleveland Indians is the gay friend or roommate or cousin or whatever of the Phillie Phanatic. He is hot pink and has a muff nose and hangs out with a bunch of giant hot dogs. No, for now we must discuss the most masculine mascot imaginable: a construction working dog with an underbite who must be restrained by chains at all times.

Scrappy, who I’m gonna go ahead and say is the nephew of that Batavia Muckdog, is the mascot of the Indians affiliate Mahoning Valley Scrappers, named after the most important thing a baseball player can have if he’s bad at all statistics: scrappiness. I’m surprised I haven’t come across a team named the “Intangibles” yet. Their mascot could be the idea of something awesome.

According to the Scrappers website, Scrappy is a “junkyard dog,” meaning you should not purchase or try to eat cakes around Scrappy, because he will grab them. His bio also clearly hasn’t been updated in a while, because he lists his favorite player as “C.C. Sabathia or Victor Martinez.” Me too, Scrappy, me too. Now he needs to log in, change his favorite player to Luis Valbunea, and go off on a Comic Sans MS rant about the depressing state of Cleveland sports.

I’m sorry, did I start reviewing the mascots for local community pick-up leagues? State College isn’t a city that should have things named after it, it should be where sitcom characters end up when they have to go to college but can’t get the licensing rights to a real school. Wikipedia waxes philosophic on the meaning of “Spikes.”

The name “Spikes” has a threefold meaning. The club’s official logo depicts a young white-tailed deer, for whom a “spike” is an undeveloped antler, symbolic of a young team member who may develop into a Major League Baseball player. The name also refers to a railroad spike, similar to the way the name “Altoona Curve” commemorates the famous Horseshoe Curve on the Pennsylvania Railroad. Finally, baseball players have long worn shoes with spikes.

Also, spike is what you can do to a football when you score, and the players in State College often score. Finally, the name can suggest the clandestine addition of alcohol to a punch bowl at a freshman party, a situation that happens often on sitcoms where the egotistical but well-meaning son goes off to State College and ends up confronting one of his friends about the dangers of alcoholism when they get “out of control.” In conclusion …

I don’t know, man, that thing looks dangerously close to disrobing and having sex in a messed up cartoon I hate from the 70s.

Earlier in this slideshow (I hope you’ve enjoyed clicking through quickly to avoid the words) Jason Fry mentioned Scooter of the Staten Island Yankees as the screwed up idea of marketing stooges, and frankly, I just don’t see it. Scooter’s full name is Scooter the Holy Cow, and he is venerated by Mahatma Gandhi. He said: “I worship it and I shall defend its worship against the whole world,” and that, “The central fact of Hinduism is cow protection.” He regarded her better than the earthly mother, and called her “the mother to millions of Indian mankind.” Other than being the mascot for a Yankees team and not a Cleveland team, I’m not sure what the problem is.

Scooter’s contemporary is Red, named after Red Barber, the famous Communist hairdresser who attended Yankees games between 1954 and 1966. They have entertained the Staten Island fans for years through a combination of “running the bases, wrestling one another, or creating all types of mischief.” That sounds more like the Mets than the Yankees, but still, not much of a problem.

Oh, wait, I know: they’re marketing f**king wacky cow mascots to dickhead Yankees fans who can’t communicate the fun of baseball to others without spitting and waggling their crotches about. I’m sorry, I understand now. Yankees fans don’t want puns, they want drunk driving and excuses about how much pressure the media puts on you. Here’s a pitch for the new Staten Island mascot: Jim Leyritz, covered in Muppet fur.

I’m shocked we’ve gotten this far into mascot reviews without more cats named “Southpaw.” The picture above sort of skirts the line between what I consider a fun, acceptable mascot and what I consider 4Chan.

To the far left, we have a person dressed in an oddly-colored horse costume. It looks like pajamas with a horse head, so immediately my brain goes “sexual deviancy and not the good kind, woop woop woop” and I click away. On the far right we have a chicken suit, which doesn’t make me think it’s going to have sex with me, but it does make me feel like something unfunny is about to happen, and that’s almost as bad. Second from the right is Southpaw, the mascot for the Tri-City Valley Cats, and he is a cat who has paws and “southpaw” is a baseball term. That’s the sweet spot. I’m not afraid of him and I don’t think he’s going to make my day worse, so I’d like to high-five him and take a picture.

Between Southpaw and the infamous chicken is something called “Puckman,” a local hockey mascot who doesn’t look like a puck, wears a construction hat and has “RPI” written across his chest. It stands for “Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute,” but I’m going to keep pretending it stands for “Runs Patted In.” And the line between enjoying a mascot and f**king it gets thinner. Oh, but did you know that Pac-Man’s original name was Puckman? Come closer and let me tell you about it.

From the Jamestown Jammers of the WNBA to the Vermont Lake Monsters of the American Hockey League. Their mascot is a dinosaur named “Champ,” because I guess technically a dinosaur could be a lake monster.

Theory: The original teams in the New York-Penn League all had normal names. They were, like, the Vermont Cardinals and the State College Astros and the Jamestown Royals. Right? But then sometime in the late 90s teams with wacky names like the UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs and the Carolina Mudcats got popular, and local teams realized the power of unique branding and started naming folks whatever the hell they could. That’s how we almost got a team named the Furniture Makers.

Anyway, Champ is named after the legendary not-Loch Ness Monster, and I only know what “Champ” is because of that one episode of the Venture Bros. I’ll be honest with you, I didn’t even know Vermont had lakes. I mean, I guess it makes sense, but the thought never crossed my mind. Does Oklahoma have a sand dune? I’m sure they do somewhere.

AHHHH

AHHHHHHHHHHH

This godawful thing from my darkest nightmares is Boomer, mascot of the Williamsport Crosscutters, the team that replaced the Williamsport Costcutters when they couldn’t cover their overhead and went out of business. The Crosscutters name “reflects the logging heritage of Williamsport,” so what better mascot than a wolf who has been physically ravaged by a saw blade. Boomer is walking roadkill, and you can tell by his horribly-scarred cock-eyes, his cold, dead grin, or the fact that he’s surrounded by a bunch of chubby white teens from the middle of Pennsylvania.

There isn’t much more I can type, so here’s a video of Boomer performing a magic trick. I’ve got to warn you; I haven’t watched the entire thing, so it might involve him jamming a pencil up somebody’s nose.

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