Only you can help.

For the price of two or three fancy lattes a day you can give a hipster access to Wi-Fi.

Hi. I’m a guy from The Onion’s AV Club forums, here to talk to you about a horrible, unseen evil right here in America: a lack of socially acceptable Internet devices for hipsters in cafes across the country. Today with the economy slow to recover and many know-it-alls in their 20s too bearded, “eclectic,” or adorned in stupid glasses and leggings to be employable we’re facing a shortage of epidemic proportions. But it’s not hopeless. Not as long as there are people like you, and the ViewSonic gTablet.

For a low one-time donation or several monthly donations if you’re not into paying up your credit cards in a timely manner, you can donate this tablet to a hipster in your neighborhood. It runs on Android 2.2; that’s way cooler than any iPhone OS these days. Its 10.1” capacitive touch screen is just big enough for everyone else in the coffee shop to see the live performance video of some indie darling band they’ve never heard of in beautiful 1080p.

Please. Donate now. You’ll receive monthly updates on your hipster via seemingly random photos and “ironic” quotes on their Tumblr. More importantly, you’ll know that you’ve made a difference in helping an entitled, good for nothing, holier-than-thou jerk espouse his worthless opinions online.

Authorized for SquareTrade Extended Warranty

"

Warranty: 1 Year ViewSonic

Condition: New

Features:

• The ViewSonic gTablet has a crisp and vibrant 10.1” capacitive touch screen display with plenty of real estate for even the most demanding tablet users
• Great for multitasking, viewing multiple apps, and browsing web pages in their entirety, including the ability to play Flash videos
• With is 1080p playback resolution, sharing entertainment and photos on this gorgeous display is truly a delight
• Extensive format support includes H.264, WMV, WMA, MP3, DivX and more
• Easy to take anywhere with its super slim and sleek design and smooth beveled edges. Weighing in at 1.5 pounds and just 0.5” thick, just grab it and go
• Newly revised OS gives you the ability to switch between TapnTap menu environment and Droid graphic environment with a single screen touch and results in improved system stability and speed
• Engineered with you in mind, the navigation is practically instinctive. You find the buttons exactly where you would have placed them, which will have you toggling, searching, going back and moving forward all at lightning speed
• On-display buttons include Search, Home, Menu and back. Volume rocker is located on top
• You get an awesome performance from practically any source with this tablet: play music files, watch movies, or upload images from your camcorder and share entertainment with your friends on the go
• Switch between apps and tasks instantly: while checking email, download apps while updating your calendar, jump from reading your eBooks to keeping up with your favorite blogs
• Open multiple apps with the flick of a finger. It is so intuitive, you’ll be able to pinch, scroll, rotate or zoom to your heart's content
• Expandable memory up to 32GB via microSD
• Offers 3.5 mm headphone jack, USB port, and mini USB port
• Direct access to the Apps Store to download thousands of leading Android apps
• Features Google’s Android 2.2 OS with new features and benefits such as faster web browsing, simple app launching and updating, and a completely more intuitive experience
• Improvement in JavaScript loading, better overall performance of Android OS, USB and Wi-Fi Internet Tethering, Microsoft Exchange integration, compass support for Google Maps, improved Google Voice Search that recognizes long and complicated speech
• Now you can contact anyone just the way they like. Use email, video chatting, tweet them on Twitter or update your status on Facebook
• Wi-Fi b/g/n support, video conferencing via 1.3MP camera, and Bluetooth support with 8-10 hours of battery life
• Experience the power of NVIDIA’s latest processor. Designed for mobile applications, you will experience super fast gaming, crystal clear 1080p HD video, blazingly fast web access and surreal HD video chatting
• 1 GHz Dual ARM Cortex-A9 processor, 512MB DDR2 memory, 2D/3D Graphics processing, HD Video encode and decode, Ultra-low power GeForce GPU, 1080p video playback processor, OpenGL ES 2.0, and 32-bit LP-DDR2, DDR2
• Applications and games come alive in your hand with the G sensor. Your gaming imagination never has been this real or this wild. An ambient light sensor also automatically reduces brightness in dim lit settings to conserve power. It follows your every move; it feels what you feel
• The gTablet app is preloaded, which gives you instant access to manuals, user guides, the latest update information, file download resources, support hotline number, source code information for developers, and more
• Quick Start Guide (click here)
• Users Guide (click here)
• How to Use Android (click here)

Additional Photos:

• Power Button, USB Port, Speakers, Headphone Jack, and Power Port
• Speakers and On-Display Controls
• Volume Rocker
• Microphone and Proprietary Port
• Back Profile
• 1080p Resolution Video Playback
• Best use for this and all other PCs
• Package Contents
• Packaging

Specifications
CAMERA:	1.3-megapixel camera
BATTERY:	3650mAh Li-ion polymer battery
OPERATING TEMP.:	32°F to 113°F
STORAGE TEMP.:	-4°F to 113°F
DIMENSIONS:	6.8” (H) x 10.5” (W)
WEIGHT (with battery):	1.55 lbs.
MEMORY:	16GB internal memory
INPUT/OUTPUT:	USB 2.0 (Slave) Mini USB 2.0 (Host) 3.5mm stereo headphone MicroSD DC Input (Power)
OPERATING SYSTEM:	Google Android 2.2 (Froyo)
CPU:	1GHz NVIDIA Tegra 2-Dual-core ARM Cortex-A9 CPU with 512MB DRR
VIDEO:	NVIDIA Tegra 2, OpenGL ES 2.0, 32-bit LP-DDR2, DDR2
DISPLAY:	10.1” TFT-LCD with LED driver system
NETWORK:	Wi-Fi : 802.11 b/g/n Bluetooth 2.1 + EDR
RESOLUTIONS:	1024x600 resolution
AUDIO OUTPUT:	Built-in 2 x 1-watt stereo speakers 3.5mm stereo headphone
POWER:	7.4 Voltage Power Adapter
SUPPORTED MEDIA FORMATS:	S1080p H.264/H.263/ VC-1/MPEG-2/4/WMV9/DivX 4/5 Video Decode 1080p H.264/MPEG-4 Video Encode Supports multi-standard audio formats, including AAC, AMR, WMA, and MP3

Included Software

Adobe Flash Player Kindle Pandora Radio G-market Angry Birds Color Note

In the box:

• ViewSonic gTablet 10.1” PC Android 2.2 (UPS300-2.2)
• USB Cable
• Power Adapter
• Cleaning Cloth
• ESD Cover
• User Guide
• Quick Start Guide

 

photo credit: juplife

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Ever feel like you’re being ignored? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH? KITTEH?

kittehz r teh ignorerz, nawt teh ignoreez.

Clik teh foto 2 add a funneh capshun!

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What's he going to do? Build tools. "[T]ools for writers, designers, programmers, whatever," he writes. "Wherever people are using computers to turn their ideas into reality, I want to help." That sounds awesome.

Sponsor

Hewitt continues:

"I've spent the last four years of my career working on a very different kind of software. At Facebook, I've gotten to build communications tools that reach hundreds of millions of people. I've had the honor of seeing people, even my own parents, using my apps while walking down the street, in restaurants, on trains, in planes and everywhere I go. Still, I haven't been able to stop thinking about Firebug.

"Technologies have a way of growing faster than the ecosystem of tools needed to support them. Over the last four years, we've seen the rise of mobile apps, the cloud, and now HTML5. Most developers building on these new platforms are using the previous generations of tools along with a mix of ad-hoc scripts and Web apps to get things done. It works, but it is far from ideal. In fact, it reminds me a lot of the Ajax climate back in 2006 when I decided to make Firebug.

"And so, I'm independent now, and I'm going to pour myself into understanding the needs of modern developers and designers, and creating software to fill those needs. There are so many opportunities that I can't even predict what I will end up building, but I am pretty sure I know where I am going to start. I can't wait."

Other blogs will focus on Hewitt's incredible success building Facebook's mobile offerings, but imagine the wisdom from that experience turned to face outward. Leading developer and former director of developer tools at Mozilla Dion Almaer writes tonight, "I have never been as excited about someone leaving a company as hearing that Joe Hewitt has moved on for Facebook to become an independent developer."

Hewitt's plan to build tools for other developers (much less writers and designers!) points towards a future where the Web is a platform for democratized creation again. A generative force, not a new walled garden silo for passive consumption of media on a mass scale.

Facebook is many things; on the positive side it's been an incredible introduction to a writeable, personalized, feed-driven, mobile, social, place-aware Web for hundreds of millions of people. Just like AOL was too often mistaken for the entirety of the Web in the old days, though, there's a risk that many people will treat Facebook like the entirety (or at least the center) of the Web today and in the future.

There's nothing hotter right now than mobile design and applications and there are few things online more conflicted with potential and confusion at the same time as HTML5. Some tools-driven leadership could come in very handy in both departments.

Joe Hewitt creating for creators, on the open Web, sounds like very good news for the Web and its future.

Discuss

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FASHUN! Put it awl awn meh; ai am anywun u want meh 2 b!

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